Sunday, February 14, 2010

Saying Goodbye and not even remembering it????

You know what is really scary? Is having your husband leave the house and tell you goodbye, you tell him goodbye, you hn call your husband and say where are you and he says, I left don't you remember and you are totally clueless to it ALL!! I honestly do not remember telling him goodbye, that really scares me.

I am so tired of being tired. I am so tired of laying around doing nothing. I want to do stuff. I want to be active. I want to be walking every day, doing stuff outside. I am so tired of this cold weather!! Yea, Jim has just agreed to bundle up and go for a 15 minute walk walk with me! I am so excited. I had a pretty good morning and ok early afternoon. Around 3ish I started to get tired and drowsy, achy, legs hurting. I took my meds and layed down for awhile.
Jim just got home from youth and I am feeling kinda ok and really want to get some fresh air!!! I know it is going to be very very cold but am looking forward to it!! YEA!!!!!!

My head feels clear right now, now if I could just get my body to cooperate! I have not taken any Lyrica since I started my new meds on 2/4. Yea :) I can actually wear my wedding rings and my fingers don't hurt :)

I am repeating myself here but I am going crazy...I am so tired of not getting things done. It is so not like me to make a list and not get it done. It is not like me to not make a list. I get so little done during my day and I feel like it is a big accomplishment. This from a person that used to be able to work 10-12 hours then come home, clean, cook supper, work outside or just sit around with friends. Now I am so afraid to do anything with friends.

I felt like such a bad person today. Jim was wanting to invite our friends over for the Daytona 500. Guys watch the race and drink beer and the wifes just sit around and drink. Well except me of course, on my new meds I will really be watching my drinking. I was ok with the guys coming over but was scared about the woman coming over because I didn't know if I would have the energy to entertain. I used to love having people over now I just want to be is so not fair to Jim!

Where is the warm sunshine? I have got to get back on track!! I cannot let this beat me!! I don't and won't let this become my routine....I will not lay around, I will complete things!
As I keep saying, the pain is unbelievable but having NO energy is just as bad!!

Gotta go, time for my walk! 15 minutes but I will take what I can get :)

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