Is it hard being my friend? You know how when you call someone, you sometimes ask how you doing? Do you cringe if you accidentally ask me that? Think, lord here she goes again!! Well if it makes you feel any better, I really don't know what to say when you ask me that question. Do I answer with I feel like crap or answer with I feel ok when I don't. I just had a friend call and asked me how I was doing and I had to ask her to hold on. I was trying to get myself under control and not cry. I was sitting here feeling pretty bad and thinking how my emotions are up and down from one minute to the next. How 1 minute I feel great and think I will be "normal" and then wham, guess what I realize I have this SHIT for life!!!! Sorry, just needed to say that!!
Anyway, my friend called and I didn't want her to have to "deal" with me being all emotional so I asked her to hold on a second got my self under control and came back on the line and said....Hey girl what you up to? ( in my usual perky, up beat voice) I wonder what she would have done if I would have just let the tears fall and had a good ol cry like I was feeling at the moment?? I have several woman friends and lately have been thinking alot about them and how they are in my life. How they react to me??? What do they want from me? Where do I really stand with them? Jim and I had a great conversation Sunday about my woman friends and me not working and how hard it is for me not being out and about so to speak....I hope that makes some sort of sense. I mean having a woman friend that understands you NO MATTER what and gets you NO MATTER what is a ONCE in a life time thing. ( ok maybe a 2 times) Having a friend like this when you have fibromyalgia.....that is asking alot, isn't it???
I mean who can I really call when I need a good cry? Who can I call when I need someone to make me feel all better. I know I can call Jim at any time and he is my rock!! But as a woman, we like having that friendship and not having it sometimes can really suck!!
*i know i repeated myself in the previous paragraph just didn't feel like changing it*
On a fun note...March 6th, I am going to see Menopause the Musical with a group of beautiful woman friends and I cannot wait!! We are going to do lunch first and I am just praying and praying that I have a great day!!!!