I have my monthly doctors appointment (my pain doctor) next week and I am excited and nervous at the same time. I have been taking the same pain med for the past 2 years (oxy) I am a little nervous about going because we are going to be taking me off of the oxy....I know, I know, please don't start with all the O no the withdrawals are going to be terrible!! And before you start wanting to judge me the only reason I am coming off of the oxy is because of my IBS....constipation!! Yes, I just said it for the world to see...but I have said it before...:)
I didn't take the oxy to get high!!! I never felt buzzed!! IT HELPED WITH MY PAIN....it still wasn't 100% but it helped. I have also been taking something else that my pain doctor prescribed for me.
Anyway back to coming off of the oxy, I am nervous because I do know there will be some withdrawals to go thru...my doctor and I decided it would not be a good idea to do this during the holidays so January it is..:) I am not sure what we are going to try but I trust him. I am sure I will be doing lots of posting...
I am going to ask for a shot in my left hip...it has been giving me a fit more and more every day, especially in the morning. I defiantly can't keep it in the same position for very long...
My stomach woke me up again this morning about 5ish....the pain is so intense it hurts when I take a deep breath or if I try to move to my side...I have even layed in bed a cried because I just want to wake up and NOT hurt.....I mean come on, I have the fibro pain but my stomach, come on now!!!!!!!!!!!
This past week I have been very lucky as far as going into a full flare. With sitting at the hosp and keeping very odd hours, not getting alot of sleep, just plain ol stress. Yesterday was probably my worse day, my pain level was about a 6 1/2and my energy level was way low.
Jim has been very patient with me thru all this...I know it is not easy for him...I wish I could really explain how I feel to him. Yesterday he was really tired and said he wanted to go back to bed and sleep. I almost said to him, welcome to my everyday world..haha
Right now I feel kind of disconnected from my body??? It's kind of hard to explain...I feel numb. It's not a bad thing, I mean I am not upset or anything?? I can't explain it....
One more note, they are talking about the golden globe awards show and I think I should win one!!! I should win one for BEST ACTRESS!! I can go out and put on a show and NO ONE will no I am in pain....unless they really know me or care enough to pay attention....look in my eyes, really look in my eyes! Look at my smile, really look at my smile!
It amazes me when people say, you look great.....they are really NOT looking at me!!!